Archive for the ‘Modesty’ Category
I have a couple other ladies in the process of completing their Modesty Monday profiles, but I would really appreciate your help in finding more!
Who do you know that dresses (and behaves!) modestly? A blogger you know of? A WAHM with a cottage business? A friend from church? YOU?
Please pass along the request to anyone you know who would be a good guest for Modesty Monday. The “requirements” are very simple, and very flexible.
They (or you) can email Tiffany at: tiffany (at) tiffanyblitz.com
Anyhow, I’d like to introduce you to Ringger Clothing, a family-run business that I have somehow missed since they moved online in 2003 (they started from home in 1987!). That’s their beautiful family in the photo.
They ran a special over the summer for a “we pick the fabric” pair of A-line skirts, which I decided to take advantage of for Jewel.
Of course we added pockets for Miss Hankie, and they were happy to customize for her tall, skinny measurements. They were also wonderful about allowing us to have input into the colors / patterns we’d like, from the pieces they had available for this promotion.
Here’s Jewel, replacing a lost statue on the grounds at Beauvoir, wearing one of the lovely skirts we received.
We were delighted with the skirts, and especially delighted with the service. I would not hesitate to recommend Ringger for all your modest clothing needs.
One thing you definitely need to do is head over to the Ringger Clothing website, and sign up for their newsletter. That way you’ll hear about all the great sales and specials that come along!
AND … Amy of Ringger Clothing would like to offer some specials just for you, the faithful As For My House readers!
Through the end of November, you can take advantage of these great offers. And naturally, knowing how I am about them, she included POCKETS!
- Order any ladies or plus size skirt and get free pockets or a free ruffle on it.
- Order any TWO girls skirts and get free pockets or a free ruffle on one of them.
To take advantage of these, place your order through the website for the “basic” skirt(s), then send them an email to Amy (ringgerclothing (at) gmail.com) with your “upgrade” request, mentioning that you saw the offer on As For My House.
- Also, you can visit their Unique and Preowned page and choose a free item worth $20 or less if you place any order on the website (from that page, or custom made) over $75. This deal is only good until Nov. 7, 2011.
Don’t forget – you’ll find Ringger Clothing, and many other great resources, listed on the Modest Clothing Links page!
(This is not a sponsored post)
I’d like to introduce you to a wonderful new modest clothing site I found: Far Above Rubies.
I have worn both my denim skirt AND my denim jumper literally beyond frayed edges, and Jewel and I are supposed to wear denim bottoms for our Keepers at Home club “uniform” to the meetings. So I ordered an A-line Cargo Skirt.
This elastic waist a-line skirt has cargo pockets on each side. It comes in twill or denim. 100 % cotton / poly cotton fabrics. Machine wash – tumble dry. Great for everyday wear. Comes in sizes XS through XL. Lengths are 34 or 37 inches. Also available in Plus and Girls Sizes.
Mine is a very cute denim pinstripe that doesn’t seem to be listed on the site anymore. (And might be pushing it a bit for the Keepers “uniform”, but so be it!) 37″ is my usual length, so their intended “long” skirt is perfect for me.
The charming and helpful proprietor, Ginny, assures me, however, that they can make any adjustments needed to the garment (within the possibilities of the design) – adding length, adding pockets (since you know I asked that!), etc. Although the website can give the impression of ready-to-wear, in-stock clothes, they are actually a family business doing things to order.
Apparently my measuring went awry, and the waist is still too big, so I need to tighten the elastic up a little bit before I can wear it. But I wanted to tell you how excited I am about the skirt, which is well-made and lovely.
Don’t forget – you’ll find Far Above Rubies, and many other great resources, listed on the Modest Clothing Links page!
(This is not a sponsored post)
Welcome back to Modesty Monday!
Our Modest Matron today is Sarah, who shares her story in her own words:
I am a Christian and I’ve been saved since I was 5 years old and I’m 28 now. However I’ve only been really trying to live for God in the past few years. I’ve been married for 9 years, almost 10 and I have a son that is 3 years old. I’ve worked for a health food store for 9 years in various positions, my current is in the IT department for the store.
My “modest” journey really began in earnest a year or so ago. I was raised in a Christian home and went to a Christian school through 12th grade but things like modesty were forced on me (such as in school there were regular “dress checks” even going so far as to ask you if you were wearing a slip under your dress!) As I neared the completion of high school I swore to myself that once I was out of here I would live as I wanted to and I would never force myself or anyone else to go through what I had been through. It was my life and I deserved to live as I saw fit! While I was running away from God I lived and dressed as I wanted to, nothing overtly revealing but I made no effort to hide my body, my jeans too tight, my tops too low. I felt that voice of God in my head, telling me what I was doing was not pleasing to Him but I ignored it. This was MY life and I wouldn’t let God “mess” it up for me!
My husband was in a similar situation. He was running from God and running hard. Over the years he had gotten a big motorcycle, two forearms full of tattoos and a nickname because of his extremely short attitude and menacing demeanor – The Reaper. His leather vest bore that nickname along with several skulls – a really bad person to mess with. It was not uncommon for him to make threats to people if they made him angry. Then one day – things changed. God began to work on him, began to change him. I saw these changes and felt God tugging at my heart as well but still I resisted. He began to dress differently, talk differently and at first I was put off. He seemed so much “better” and “holy” than I was which made me mad and I ran away from God all the more.
My husband brought the idea of headcovering and modest dress up and I, in no uncertain terms, told him he was an idiot for dressing the way he was (he was dressing in a “plain” style at that time, beard and all) and the only way I would dress the way he wanted me to would be when I was dead and in my casket! If I could go back in time and tell myself what I know now, I don’t think I would believe it, because here I am, dressing, acting and living this way! When God gets a hold of someone’s heart that you think is as dry as a desert, a heart that will never bring forth any good fruit again (my husband and myself included) and I can actually watch the change happen – that makes one consider their own life.
I began to study, to read, to ask questions of not only my husband but of God. I finally began dressing modestly to please my husband and God because that is what the Bible asks me to do, what God asks me to do. There is no glory in showing off my body to others when I was dressing after the world. But there is glory and honor to God when I dress the way a woman should.
It can also be a wonderful opportunity to share the good news of the Gospel to others. Especially since I wear a headcovering there are lots of people that ask questions and I’m always happy to share why I dress this way and why I do the things I do. I do them because I serve a wonderful God who wants me to not cause others to sin, to be a help meet to my husband and most of all, to keep my focus on the only thing that matters – God!
Thanks for sharing with us, Sarah!
If you want to read more, you can click the “Modesty” topic on the left side of the page, or search for “Modesty Monday”. If you would like to share your profile, or know someone who would, please let us know!
Having been covering my hair for awhile now, I am beginning to run across other situations that had never occurred to me as “issues” before.
We don’t go swimming much… Public beaches and water-parks are just too immodest for any of us to feel comfortable.
But I do want the children to learn to swim… For safety when they may be near water (fishing, boating, etc.), or even the occasional time we may want to go swimming – in a quiet “swimming hole,” at a friend’s house, who knows?
Jewel had some lessons last year through the local public pool, and I was excited to see that this year we were in time to sign her up for lessons at the base pool. When we went for registration, we learned that they also have “Mommy/Daddy & Me” lessons for R.T.’s age.
Suddenly my “it doesn’t matter” solution of just wearing a bandanna headcovering when we were near the water (something I could easily care for if it happened to get wet) didn’t seem to get the job done. A soaked bandanna is clearly not going to stay put when I’m swishing around in the pool with R.T.
I was delighted to find Princess Modest Swimwear. An Israeli company, they provide modest swimwear with an eye towards traditional Jewish modesty requirements – including headcoverings.
I picked out this one, “Aqua and Black”, which goes with the makeshift swim outfit I am wearing this season. (Swimwear, yeah, that’s got to be an entire separate post, don’t you think?)
It is essentially an ordinary lycra swim cap in the base color, with a black triangle “bandanna” of peachskin microfiber (the quick-drying stuff that men’s swim suits are often made of) sewn along one edge. You can then wrap and tie it in a variety of ways.
My only concern was one that is, while of course not “unique,” certainly one that most of you needn’t worry about – it’s One Size Fits All.
As I explained to someone recently (someone else who sold clothing items, who should have known better!), being tall makes a lot of difference in everything. Someone who is six feet tall is simply proportionately bigger in every respect than someone who is five feet tall. So, while of course everyone is shaped differently, overall the taller person will tend to have a bigger shoe size, a bigger wrist measurement for bracelets, and – yeah – a bigger hat size. (And on top of that I do have quite a bit of hair).
I exchanged a few emails and a phone call with Galia, the owner of Princess Modest Swimwear, who proved knowledgeable and very sweet. She described the fit, said that it was roomier than last year’s, and suggested I check out the photos of the woman in the purple suit on the website, who had very big hair. In the end, though, she didn’t want me to purchase it if I was going to wind up unhappy.
Given all that, I decided to purchase it, with the clearly stated intention that I would take the chance, give her feedback on the fit either way, and pass it on to bless someone else if it turned out not to fit. That’s where you come it – skip down to the bottom if you can’t wait!
The magic of Google allowed me to find a lycra swim cap in an XL size (in a cute coordinating print, even), which is working out very well for actual pool usage. (Heads-up if you go on such a search – sites that have swim caps also often carry advertisements for swim suits, and not modest ones, either!)
I can certainly see, though, that if I was going to be spending the day with Wolf and Jewel while they fished (not my thing), or similarly “hanging out” in a possibly-wet-but-not-swimming setting, it would be nice to have the additional “scarf” piece to reduce the possibly dorky I’M A SWIM CAP look.
and offer an XL size next year!
Order your own stylish Swim Head Covering directly from Princess Modest Swimwear.
As of today (disclaimer just in case someone digs this up later) they sell for $14, with Free Shipping in Israel, or $5 Shipping anywhere else in the world.
One lucky As For My House reader will win their own Aqua/Black Swim Head Covering
This is the one that I ordered to check out. It has only been tried on, never worn out of the house or around water…
Make sure to leave your email address with each comment. (Used only to contact the winner. If your email is entered in the form it will be saved for me but not displayed).
1. Leave a comment here letting me know what you currently do (or don’t do!) about headcovering in the water.
Extra Entries (leave separate comments for each).
Once you have completed #1, you can earn additional entries by doing any or all of the following.
2. Become a Facebook Fan of Princess Modest Swimwear.
3. Subscribe to As For My House in your favorite feed reader, or by email. (Current subscribers count, too!)
4. and 5. Post this giveaway to your Facebook wall (leave your Facebook name), or Tweet about it (and leave the link)! Each may be done daily for extra entries.
In additon to these, there are MANY more ways to earn extra entries. You know, all the usual stuff like sharing on Facebook, Tweeting, and so on? Just click over to our Giveaway Policy page for all the details!
This giveaway ends 7/11/2011 at 11:59pm (Central), or more likely some time the following morning when I log in again. (If you can still leave a comment, you can still enter).
The winner will be chosen using random.org and announced on the blog, as well as contacted by email. Winner must respond within 48 hours, or a new winner will be selected. I will ship to your U.S. mailing address only. You may choose to pay the difference if you would like insurance, or shipping to anywhere else – Canada, Costa Rica, or wherever!
** This giveaway is now closed. Look for the winner to be announced in a separate post. **
I was “disclosing” before it was cool. See my Review Policy for the full scoop.
I hardly expected to find an article saying the same things as my recent rant about immodest clothes for little girls on CNN.com.
Yep, you read that right.
LZ Granderson wrote a very strongly worded article called, Parents, don’t dress your girls like tramps. YES!!
There was even a piece on this issue that aired on Good Morning America, complete with pop psychology about why little girls shouldn’t dress that way.
And to all those who lament that they buy it because, “that’s what’s out there in the stores”?
You’ve all heard my thoughts on that, but LZ has another very pointed declaration:
Why are the retailers selling that stuff?
Because we’re buying it!
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, there is still such a thing as “voting with your wallet”.
Stores keep selling it because consumers keep buying it, so those of us who don’t like it assume that we are in a small minority.
But LZ’s column gives me hope that this is not the case. Perhaps this is another case of the silent majority.
- There are, no doubt, some people who like those things for their little girl, as puzzling as that seems.
- Then there are some people who are totally indifferent, and buy it because it’s there.
- And some who feel peer pressure, and some who give in to their children’s peer pressure, who buy it because it is what some celebrity is wearing.
- Of course then comes the potentially huge group of people who don’t necessarily like these clothes for their child, but allow them to wear it because it is “all that’s out there”, and they haven’t bothered to take the next step and find an alternative. (As I mentioned in my post linked above, this includes an alarming number of Christian families, including those in positions of leadership).
- Combined with the admittedly smaller group of us who are already actively avoiding these items
If people really would just speak up, we could change the world…
Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.
In addition to the usual application of this verse, I believe very strongly that this is something we ought to bear in mind as we dress our little girls.
Too often I hear from parents that they don’t necessarily think that what their daughters wear is ideal, but that they don’t have any choice since those styles are all that’s available at WalMart, at the mall, or wherever they usually shop.
That makes me angry, and sad, and frustrated… Poor Jesus, sitting up there looking down on us.
We should be willing to give our lives for our convictions, but in the end we’re not even willing to shop a little longer, spend a little more, or learn sew a little, if that’s what it takes to guard our daughters’ purity.
There are clothes today being marketed to little girls that not that long ago would only have been considered appropriate for grown women.
And there are clothes today being marketed to little girls that not that long ago would have been considered inappropriate for anyone outside of “the world’s oldest profession.”
(I’m not even going to get into the issue of bathing suits here, as that is another topic in its own right, and a deserves a post all its own.)
What do we think our little girls are learning, when we dress them, or allow them to dress, in clothes that reveal or emphasize parts of their body that are “private”?
What about this top, which I recently received in a box of swapped clothes for Jewel:
Sure, the sleeved sweater top layer covers the shoulders, solving the tank-top immodesty problem… But why does a six year-old need to have something tied across, emphasizing her breasts? Again, remember that although she doesn’t have any mass there yet, we’re training her about how ladies dress.
Would you wear that?
Yes, I realize that this top would not be looked at twice by most folks in our society today, whether worn by a female age 35, age 15, or age 5.
But, like the old Hebrew National hot dog commercial, we’re supposed to be answering to a Higher Authority.
If we don’t train our daughters in modest dress from the beginning, but rather dress them in the same clothes as the rest of the world buys at WalMart, why are surprised when our teenage daughters want to dress in clothes that are designed to be seductive – the same ones the rest of the world buys at WalMart?
Nothing warms my heart like hearing my five year-old daughter lean over and whisper in my ear that the lady who we just passed in the grocery store isn’t dressed modestly!
I wanted to take a minute to share with you a shop I’ve been blessed to find: Jumpin’ Bloomers. (All photos in this post are from their site).
They offer, as the name might suggest, several adorable options in bloomers for ladies (from infant to adult!).
I have ordered several pairs for Jewel, and we have been delighted.
The fit is comfortable (and they will gladly adjust to your measurements), the style is cute, the construction is sturdy… And of course, they are a necessary item for the modesty of active girls.
Did I mention that the price is right?
I still feel guilty for not sewing everything myself, but in the moments of realism I am able to search out other people who are more gifted in this area, and appreciate the blessing of their ministry.
They’ve just added a third style of cuff – and option for a wide piece of lace edging the bottom of the bloomers. Perfect for my little princess on her LESS crazy days!
Jumpin’ Bloomers also has petticoats, aprons, dresses, nightgowns, and more. How cute are these Prairie Dresses and Pinafores?
So, if you’re also not yet up to making it all yourself, here’s another option for keeping the young ladies dressed as, well, young ladies.
I was “disclosing” before it was cool. See my Review Policy for the full scoop.
A comment was left on another post that I thought was worth sharing:
I just came across your blog and it’s interesting to me. I have been dressing modestly and conservatively for a year or so, and learned to sew in order to make my own dresses. But I have one problem: I have a job in the deli department of a grocery store that requires “black pants” as part of the dress code. They do allow me to wear my headcovering as long as I wear a hairnet underneath, but asking permission to wear skirts seems like a real stretch. I’m really not sure what I should do.
As it happens, this is a subject that we have discussed in various forms, as we contemplate how life will play out for Jewel as she grows up with these beliefs. (I was not raised this way, nor was Wolf’s family following this path).
We agree that there are certain sports or activities that require or are facilitated by a specific garment, and we are willing to consider a gi for martial arts, a split skirt for horseback riding or fencing, or a modest swimsuit for swimming (Jewel has one from Wholesome Wear).
Many jobs have uniforms, and wearing a proper uniform is a condition of employment.
In some jobs, the uniform is clearly immodest, and they seem unlikely to allow a modest alternative – for example Hot Dog on a Stick, Hooters, Victoria’s Secret models, or NFL Cheerleaders. In these cases, the immodest nature of the costume is a key part of the job. This, obviously, is a job we would never want our daughter to take… And, by extension, we feel that no young (or old!) lady should take, and, in fact, society would be better off without.
In some other jobs, the uniform is immodest for practical reasons – which would apply to pretty much any hard physical labor job, such as construction, plumbing, mechanic, etc. Although I would not personally say “couldn’t”, it does seem that in these cases it would be difficult, awkward, and sometimes potentially dangerous to do these jobs in a modest skirt. Although not a popular view in modern society, this is a case where I am glad men can do these jobs and women don’t have to!
The job in question, to my way of thinking, falls into this next category. In some jobs, as pants were becoming normalized as female attire in our society, women probably fought for the right to be allowed to wear pants not all that long ago! There is no more reason someone working in a deli should not be allowed to wear a skirt, than a secretary, or a waitress, or a nurse.
In this type of job, the uniform that they instruct you to wear may specify “pants,” just because it never occurred to anybody that any other choices ought to be included or considered. Usually, a polite and direct request will be met with – perhaps surprise or confusion first, but acceptance.
I have seen women wearing modest clothing in grocery store delis, fast food restaurants, and other situations where “everyone wears pants”. (And I always try to thank them for being a good example!)
From this particular question: Having already worked there and worn pants, you may feel awkward about stating that this is a strongly held religious conviction will seem hypocritical. I would simply be candid when you speak to your supervisor about it, explaining that (whatever the case may be):
- You were afraid to have the conversation, because you value your job, but your conscience is bothering you more and more about what you truly believe about feminine attire
- You have been studying the Bible and becoming more and more convinced about the importance of feminine attire
Odds are, I believe, that the uniform policy can be changed to include a skirt option in the vast majority of cases. You may have to step through some hoops: going to HR, calling a Corporate office, waiting for a Board meeting, or whatever… But following through on this process is an important Kingdom work that you can do!
There is, of course, some chance that you will come up against adamant refusal, and then you will have a choice to make. A job is a precious commodity in this economy, and I realize it seems like a horrible bind.
But we must remember that we are called to make all our choices based on the Word.
Matthew 6:24 – No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.
People take or refuse to take jobs every day based on their standards of morality. You would probably not dream of taking a job at Hooters… A difference of degree is no difference.