Wolf has been nudging me for a while to post more about the aspects of our beliefs that are furthest from society’s norms. While these are, of course, the things most likely to stir up controversy, they are also the things that most need to be said aloud.

I hadn’t really intended to jump into one right now, but I suddenly found myself in the middle of a Facebook controvery, so I figure the least I can do is share it here…

Checking in on my Facebook feed Tuesday, I was startled to see pictures of women in bathing suits parading across the screen. Yikes!

Turns out that this feed was from… Lands’ End.

Now, I don’t simply want to “un-fan” their page, if I have a choice.

I like thier high-quality products, and great service. I buy kids’ clothes from them, as well as outerwear and accessories. I just got a package from them, in fact, with some cute dresses, tops, and tights for Miss J that I snagged during their Winter Clearance.

Cute, eh? And modest…

Anyhow, I decided that the proper thing to do was to simply let the company know how I feel, so that they can decide how to proceed.

The Facebook feed is a very intrusive form of advertising, after all.

I can choose not to go to a crowded beach. I can choose not to watch TV and see that kid of ad. I can choose not to buy the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue (or Cosmo, or…).

And, even, if Lands’ End sends me an email with the subject “Summer 2010 Swimwear is Here!” I can choose to delete rather than open it…

But if they publish it on Facebook, those images pop up right before my eyes.

Unless I totally disconnect from them. As I discussed above, this means I don’t get the sale offers and such, and they lose me totally as a customer.

Maybe that’s not what they want. Certainly they could just as easily post a link to the swimwear photos, if they chose. But they have no idea that this is even an issue, I’m sure…

So, I told them.

I left this comment on the photos posted to my newsfeed. I was trying to keep it light:

Sure wishing I could receive news updates without seeing this on my home page… I know it defies the cultural norm, but in our house we try to avoid looking at women wearing nothing but underwear (and this is the same amount of coverage, kwim?).

How about a little nod to modesty?

Well, the response was rapid, violent, and offensive.

The comments (from men and women alike) suggested that I “have problems,” must live in a cave, have no business owning a computer, “need more hobbies,” and on and on.

Interestingly, there was a comment later in the thread from a Jewish gentleman who said,

Please do not send pictures of immodestly dressed ladies to my news feed. If you do it again I am dropping out of Land’s End.

…and nobody said a word to or about him. Hmmmm.

On the up side, there were some supportive folks who posted, as well as some who messaged me privately. A couple of women took the time to post comments with good explanations – which were simply ignored.

Later I posted a status update on my own feed asking my modest friends to let Lands’ End know how they felt (via the website, not by entering into the comment fray). Interestingly, even there, non-modest-dressing folks felt the need to pick up the debate.

If you would like to let Lands’ End know that they have other modest customers, you can leave a comment on their Facebook Fan Wall (no swim photos there!), or through their Corporate Feedback Form. UPDATE: You may email them directly at socialmedia@landsend.com.

Just to pre-empt some of the negative comments that will probably start showing up here, too, let me address some of the things that seem to keep cropping up in the current discussion threads:

• Why don’t I un-fan or Hide them, then just go check their page for sales and such? Well, you can say “it only takes 1 second…” but think about it, really: I’d have to maintain a list of the 20 stores I care about (or whatever). I type the first name in the search box, then click to get to their page. I read a few entries, seeing what’s new. Repeat ad nauseum. I simply do not have the time and energy to do that… And, really – what’s the point of Facebook, if I’m going to use it just like going to each store’s website every day?
• I have never suggested that Lands’ End shouldn’t have the freedom to sell (and even advertise) whatever they want. I have never suggested that you do not have the right to purchase or wear whatever you want. I am not trying to “impose my morality” on anyone – I am simply trying to provide Lands’ End some information about a segment of their current customer base, in relation to this brand new avenue of marketing. That way they can make an informed decision about how to proceed.

Sure, I know most Americans disagree with my definition of “modesty.” But I’ve got to say I find it weird that so many people are so offended by my comment… Isn’t it hyporitical to say that they have the freedom to show the pictures, but I don’t even have the freedom to make a comment about it?

Lands’ End may not choose to change, in the end, and then I will simply un-fan them and shop elsewhere, unless they happen to send a good offer to my email. It is not a “big deal” in my life.

But modesty is a big deal, and I will continue to speak up for it in public places. It is because we all sit quietly by, while having to flinch away from the racy images on highway billboards, that this kind of thing continues to escalate in our culture.

6 Responses to “A Firestorm at Lands End”